Am I dreaming?
Cause I know I'm crying
but I don't feel the tears
on the familiar part of the cheek.
But I know I'm tearing up hard
because I haven't been noticing
that I needed it
since forever.
And forever is a long, long time
if you lost your way
says Thomas who I see singing
from under the cork tree.
"Your favorite bands are the ones
you overplay through your misery"
A voice came from somewhere
but not inside this old house in front of me.

The house is being hugged
by the same luscious cork tree
which also bears mango fruits--
interracial tree-fucking right there.
The old house feels very familiar though.
It smells like home for years,
but it reeks like teen spirit
of unwelcoming juvenility.
The windows are closed.
And no door to be seen.
The only way is through the chimney
if you climb the fortuitous wood.
"Do you need me to climb the tree?"
The same voice again from earlier.
On top of a branch,
a girl in a ninja outfit showed up.

She seems familiar but she really isn't.
I never got the chance to
with all the concealment jutsus
so I just said "Yes, help me"
She said "No I won't, I'm just asking"
"What an ass! But it's okay.
I shouldn't be needing anyone
to get in anyway" I retorted.
The ninja smiled and for the love
of everything that is random, she sought
"Do you watch Naruto?"
What an awkward weirdo.
I laughed so hard in response.
She protested that no one takes her seriously
and that the world hates her
or she hates the world, but mostly herself.

It took a while to climb and reach the house
and take a peak inside the chimney
Outside, everything was vibrant and vivid
Inside, it's not as happy as it's pretending.
I got so sad so she tried to console me.
This tough act ninja really has a heart,
but her heart is in the wrong place
cause I'm not sad about the house.
I'm sad we have to part ways and,
on the walk that we shared together
I have to say goodbye
without me holding her hand.
I didn't even touch it when I handed her
the 'japanese red string of fate'
But even we go as far as Shire-bound,
it wouldn't really kill me not to hold it.. right?

I woke up and I'm alive and,
this is the first day of my life.


______________________________________________________

Hey you.